Two of my brothers were in town this summer at separate times. Neither one of them told me. One I had been texting with and I invited him over to our house for dinner. I found out from my mom when he was here and left.
The other came into town for a wedding and S found out on FB.
That makes me angry. And sad. I have a connection with one out of three of my brothers. Part of it is age difference, but a part has to be the way we were raised with my mom as the sun around which all communication revolves. L and I have broken that cycle. The other two have no desire to cultivate a relationship with their siblings.
Every time I falter and wonder if I'm blowing the situation out of proportion, something happens to remind me that this is real dysfunction. It's damaging, and I don't want to continue the cycle.
I just posted and it didn't show up. My luck it will pop up twice. Anywho...I'm so sorry you have to deal with this. It sucks when these moments slap us in the face. I feel your pain to a point. My eldest brother and I did not grow up together but we've always been close, especially as we've gotten older. Well, the last 10 years or so he's decided that I'm not worth his time. He lives an hour away and regularly visits a nearby town without contacting me to see if I'm free for a visit. And he has not made one single effort to meet my child (she's 2.5). Again, I'm really sorry. Getting the cold shoulder from family is a tough pill to swallow.
ReplyDeleteOnce R's cousin accidentally texted him instead of her sister to say "You weren't supposed to tell R that I was visiting Chicago this week!" It felt crappy and that was only a cousin. For a brother to hide his visit from you? That is true dysfunction.
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