I could put this up on Baby X's page, but I feel like sharing without making people click over to the other page. You might want to skip this one if you're in a sensitive place.
Baby X has always been a great night sleeper. Naps, not so much, but he started sleeping 6-hour stretches before he was a month old, and basically slept through the night before he was 6 months old. The nap thing drove us insane however, and we would tell the day care to try to get him to sleep more by paying more attention to his tired cues. But in the infant room, the babies are all on different schedules, there was always some babies playing and I think he felt like he'd miss out if he slept. So, one 45 minute nap a day was his "normal". (The Hea.lthy Sl.eep Happ.y Chi.ld book tells me he's going to have a lower IQ because of this. To which, I happily throw the good doctor double birds). He would sleep a little more on the weekends, but not much, and his 7pm bedtime is definitely set in stone.
Fast forward to the toddler room transition. They transitioned him to the toddler room over the course of a couple of weeks, and he had no problem with the transition, we thought. Maybe a little confused at first, seemed a little sad a couple of the days that the infant teachers took him over there, but then would get over it and play away the day. The days that they had him in there for full days, he napped on the cot (at the same time as the other toddlers) for almost 2 hours. What?! Yay!
At the same time that he's been transitioned to the toddler room, we're trying to wean him from formula to whole milk. That hasn't been going well. He doesn't act like it bothers his tummy, but he's had some impressive blowouts (one of which occurred during Cit.y Par.k Ja.zz in front of my friends. haha, let's see if they want kids now after witnessing that pile of poo sitting on his stroller seat.) So, we're tinkering with formula/milk combinations, he's in the toddler room full time, he's taking 1.5 to 2 hour naps, and coming home overtired, overstimulated, and impossible to deal with. So much for the longer naps helping. We get him home at 5pm, try to feed him right away (if he hasn't passed out in the car already), and usually that ends with him having a meltdown, flinging food and screaming. (I use baby sign language, how come he isn't? argh!). So, lately, it's been a struggle to get him properly fed before putting him to bed. That translates to back to nightly bottles when he wakes up hungry, plus dealing with diarrhea on a regular basis while his gut acclimates to the cows milk.
It's been so frustrating lately, and last night things got worse. I got home from my workout at about 7pm, and S looked like Baby X had thrown up all over him. Nope, just flung some chicken and stars, was crying, wouldn't sleep, wouldn't play, inconsolable. So, I took Baby X, fed him a bottle and put him down for the night. That worked (I thought). Until 9:00pm when the wailing began. We checked on him, tried to calm him down (it didn't work), and then at 9:30 finally decided to change his diaper even though it should have been fine because it was a nightime cloth with wool cover. That, plus trying to calm him down by bringing him in our bed for a few minutes worked, and he went back to sleep pretty easily. At 1:30am wailing non-stop from his room, again. S got up, changed his diaper, put him to bed. At 6:30am, crying again, I go in, change his diaper, and what do I see? Angry. Red. Butt. Cheeks.
He has a diaper rash. Probably because of the diarrhea, and every time his diaper gets wet it hurts like a mofo. At least that's my interpretation of ear-piercing howls.
I didn't think to take a closer look when changing his diaper last night since he hasn't had a diaper rash previously. Do you know what's going through my head instead? "It's because he knows I'm not his birthmother, S isn't his birthfather, and he's figuring it out and he's not going to let us calm him down."
And there you have it. A simple problem made unnecessarily complicated in my head.
I can relate to the food throwing. Ugh! If you solve that problem let me know how you did it!
ReplyDeleteHe had a blowout thru to the stroller in cloth? That must have been a huge one! Maybe you could try a fleece liner to keep him feeling dry? Then you could use a barrier cream too. Hope his gut starts feeling better soon.
I'm sure the only thoughts going thru his head were my bum hurts, where's my mommy. :-)
The problem was that the leg gussets didn't keep it in. He pretty much missed the diaper entirely and shot it out through a leg hole. Argh!
DeleteI am sorry things are hard. We had similar problems when S went from the toddler room to the bigger kid room. She started napping/sleeping erratically, eating nothing during the day, wetting herself at naps, not getting to the potty fast enough, etc. Also, it sounds like milk might be a problem for X. These transitions take awhile. It's like getting a new job & starting a new diet at the same time.
ReplyDeleteIt took S about 3 weeks. She also started the night terrors again during that time too. Even now, she randomly has "up all night" nights where she just doesn't want to sleep at all. It's just change he is reacting to - YOU are his mommy. S is his daddy. Hugs.
Hi...im a lurker who might never have commented...adoptive mom to 9 month old E (at www.godwillfillthisnest.com) and I just laughed out loud because what you said you think I do too! He would sleep if I was his birthmom, he would not get so frustrated, he would he would he would. Meanwhile on visits he clings to me, so its just my brain being irrational :) Also with the rash with cloth diapers I would be so annoyed! I am always smug with my friends that because we CD we have NEVER had diaper rash. Grrr. Diarhhea will do that though! I have heard cutting some generic fleece from the craft store (like you would use to make a fleece tie blanket) and slather their bum with extra strength butt paste, and the cheapo fleece will protect the cloth. Good luck!!
ReplyDeleteI remember how the simplest problem suddenly escalates to "It''s ME! I'M the bad mother!" I think it's the exhaustion, the learning of so many new skills and frustration.
ReplyDeleteI know you're an awesome mom.
Just a thought, but it sounds like he's just really not ready for cow's milk. Perhaps, try cutting that out and going back to the formula for now, or even doing almond milk (nutritionally, it's just as good as cow's milk). Bay E doesn't sleep well and breaks out in ezcema patches when he has cow's milk. Sounds like with the daycare room change, he's got enough on his plate right now. Obviously you all do too! Know you're the perfect mama for baby X and he loves you. Red butt and screaming and all ;)
ReplyDeleteOver the last week, we've switched to goat's milk. HUGE difference.
DeleteUgh -- blowouts!
ReplyDeleteIt's so easy to make every thing about adoption. I think I still do that too much.
We had to avoid cow's milk altogether for my son. Even now he prefers rice milk.
Or even less fatty milk. Like 2%. And please don't be so hard on yourself. You have to respect that X will go through stages of "playing strange" or being clingy on his own schedule. No one is trying to make C feel bad so don't feel guilty. What am I saying - we're moms now so we'll find a way to feel guilty about everything.
ReplyDelete