I drove to the same building
Walked into the same door
Got on the same elevator and...
Pushed a different floor
A lump formed in my throat
When the elevator doors opened, taking the first step off was painful. Feeling like a deer in headlights, I looked around for the suite number and forced one foot in front of the other..
Down the hall, into the offices of C.C.R.M, one floor above my previous R.E.'s office.
What the hell am I doing?
Oh goodness. Good luck! I remember those emotions the first time around (I cancelled I think three times before I finally went) and I can't imagine going back there again. Well, I can but it fills me with such anxiety that I choose to just let it be and move forward on a different path. I had to explore that path though and we all have different exploration needs. It sucks, I know. You are not alone! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteThat must have been a tough moment. I know it would have been for me. I really hope they can give you some answers.
ReplyDeleteYou're only opening a door that was never totally closed. The fact that you're there means you need to have some conclusion. You're level headed enough to know when it's time to stop. And right now isn't that time.
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