Did you post a profile somewhere on the web? I ask this because our agency has been very slow over the last year and we were told that they will facilitate designated adoptions. That means if we find an expectant mother ourselves they'll go ahead and do the work just as if we were chosen from the pool. Supposedly a little profile of us will be posted on the agency's site but not yet.
I'm torn on this issue but have spoken to S's mom who works in a hospital and may have connections and to my acupuncturist who mentioned that every now and then she even treats or knows about a mother can't parent. I need to contact my gyn too. However, I know that there are sites where we can set up profiles and I'm wondering if it's worth it. Even though it's supposedly non-identifying information there is a lot of personal information in a profile so it doesn't seem all that non-identifying to me.
Anyway, just want to know other's thoughts on this.
Wow! 100 posts. Already?
*edit* I talked to our SW. Um, I missed the part where we were supposed to send in a picture and a short narrative to go on the website. Duh. So, we'll put that on the to-do list this weekend. We've also moved up a couple of spots and she said there's several placements lined up for this month which is good news for us. Oh, and S is so good at voicing my internal reactions sometimes. When I told him that it looks like it's picking up at the agency he responded "Don't you think it's weird that we're basically cheering someone on to....(fill in "place their baby" here, he didn't actually say it)". And yes, I feel caught between wanting a family so bad that I want to move up in the pool and the fact that the reason why we move up in the pool is because there's a woman out there who feels like she can't parent her own child. It's such a weird place to be.
We didn't want to do our own website for several reasons, including some desire to protect privacy, and some desire to ensure that the people who read our profile were going to go through the counseling/screening process of the agency, both for our protection and theirs. We did agree to put our photo/blurb on the agency's website. It's been there well over a year, and I'm pretty sure we haven't had a single showing as a result of it. Maybe we don't come across well, but every few months I check and it seems like all the other folks are the same ones who have been there for a while. Maybe the agency doesn't do the best job of marketing the web site. If you are interested in doing some marketing, but you aren't sure if you want to totally go it alone, you could link to the agency's site?
ReplyDeleteGood points Lane! I'm not sure how well the marketing is done either although I did see an ad on the back of a stall in a bar restroom recently.
ReplyDeleteHey Dam Chick!
ReplyDeleteSorry...couldn't resist. I LOVE the title of your blog - I found you through Denver Jen :)
Anyway...we used a lawyer, and they posted our profile on their website. We also have to give them 15 full color copies for them to hand out to expectant moms. They have 3 ways of adopting, and our way involved us not doing any advertising on our own.
However, we did tell family and friends and my ob/gyn and some of the parents of the kiddos I teach who teach high school and college. That way, if they had someone who was interested in adoption cross their paths, they could recommend us to them (and vice versa).
So...we left it up to our lawyer. I'm not sure where you live, but In.diana is a great state to adopt in. You could hire our lawyer, even though you are out of state. They work with out of state families a lot!
Glad I found you!!
really good points.... things i had never really thought of. so glad to see other adopting families are finding you here!! it is great to follow along in your journey, knowing how far you have come already. i hope that the website option comes together in the best way, preserving the most privacy for you guys.
ReplyDeleteHello! Found you through Perfect Moment Monday (haven't posted my own moment yet, but anyway...) we used an agency/didn't do any self-advertising--funny, five years ago, the online profile thing wasn't as prominent as it is today.
ReplyDeleteI recently posted at GrowninMyHeart.com about feeling guilt in adopting...very normal feelings to have! http://www.growninmyheart.com/feeling-guilt-as-an-adoptive-parent